An account

1.) I was fighting two barbarian like men with my "bodyguard." We were in a throne room that was dug into the side of a small hill, kind of like a hobbit-hole. I remember a wooden chair, which I assumed was the throne, and a small wooden box. My bodyguard was a large muscular man, though I do not recall much about his appearance other than that. We both had large golden swords that were more like a fusion of a scimitar and sickle. We were both joking that we had picked up the wrong swords. The "barbarians" also large men, who wore cow skulls on their head and also a thick hide on their shoulders. I killed one of them quite easily by cutting the side of his neck. My bodyguard pushed the other one against a wall then managed to also kill him. My bodyguard had suffered a wound on his shoulder area and let out a grunt. I asked him halfheartedly with no real care of his well being if he was okay. As soon as he said yes I turned my attention to the wooden box. Inside the box as a letter from my wife. The letter looked as if someone had typed it out on a computer then printed it out, then took the printed letter and cut each individual word out and glued it onto another piece of paper. The words at the beginning of the letter were to small to be read, but by the end they had grown quite large. The only thing I can recall of the letter was something about a poltergeist. 2.) I was riding in some sort of caravan that was made up of boxes on some type of cart. I remember the box I was riding in feeling really off balance. I then remember getting off and walking and opening a pack of hard boiled eggs. I went to eat one, but threw them away because they were warm and runny. 3.) Spoiler for Sexual Content: I was having sex with my wife in a pool of cold water. I remember feeling like there was someone watching us. I remember toward the end I began to masturbate her and the dream ended as she was beginning to climax.