Voices

Journal Entry Lucid #16 Dream,Lucid, (Comments) Background: I went to sleep wanting a LD but without forcing it. I laid in what the Tibetans call "lions position". I did not fall asleep for a while and I had other dreams and brief awakenings. Dream fragment 2 from 3:20am-6:00am"": I was playing on some game in my dream, suppose to be a virtual reality game. I put my hand out and I touched this 2in in diameter. I tried pulling it but it was strong. I kept trying and it was painful. I thought pain is like an illusion and I pulled it out. It felt like a dream I thought. I realized it was a dream. I see my mother next to me atop a of a building. She mocked me, as usual, and said, "Oh so you are in a dream, well then have fun". She tried to distract me, but I left. I jumped from the building to another. I kind of lost control but not lucidity. I see a women jumping as well. I became her them back to me then her. I no longer had a real body. This guy started fighting with me. I was lucid without control. I did not like it. I willed myself to control. I felt my body about to awaken. I started rubbing my hands. No use I still feel my body about to awaken. I became desperate. I started touching the red brick wall. I remembered what I wanted to do: telekinesis. I then see graffiti on the wall. It was a women. I started following the image and she was running and new painting was being animated when she kept running. At the edge of the wall she made a right turn. I turned around and I see this cartoony place. I was at my old elementary school, <PERSON>. I saw pictures of <PERSON> and other black people. I see them looking at me. I started to cry because I thought I have forgotten about my childhood, but here it is. A voice says with power, "the test was to see if they could get rid of your childhood". I replied no they cannot. I was so relieved and happy and crying. I saw this text that read something like, "Mothers of the Earth offer...", I agreed with it as well. I see these guys, children walk to the pictures and one guy throws food at the picture. I thought how disrespectful. I became angry. I stopped on of the food in flight. He said. "dam I missed". One said, "what if he is here". The other one said, "no he is gone". It seemed as though they could not see me. That is when I realized I could have been a child that died at the school a long time ago. He kept throwing fruits on wall. I grabbed it. I wanted to throw it back at him, but I decided not to. The fat guy says again, " I missed". I thanked my dream for leading me to such a cherished time and experience. I wanted to do the task I set out for: telekinesis, but I felt satisfied and without wanting, I awoken. I woke up feeling satisfied as if something resolved itself. When I was a child I had an after school teacher who told me that I would not amount to anything. That I could not even graduate middle school. It stuck around and I thought of myself as an idiot in elementary. This dream may have closed some old wounds regarding that, I do not know.