An account

WBTB - I woke naturally at 3:30AM but I was so tired that the thought of an extended WBTB was horrendous. My alarm went off at 4:00AM. I woke naturally again around 4:30. I got up long enough to take aids and then did some SSILD. Aids - 50MG Caffeine, 100MG B6 (I swear I thought I got up and took 5MG melatonin but I think it was a dream.) Tech - I had a hard time going back to sleep. I switched from SSILD to meditation to WILD attempt to SSILD. I was in an out of consciousness and had a few non-lucid dream fragments. I felt restless. Finally at 6:13AM I wake from a brief DILD. Notes - I am not sure what happened here but I went way past my usual 45-60 min window. Maybe it was the lower dosage that kept me from being too awake to not be able to fall back to sleep. I think tonight I would do better to get up at 3:30 and see if I can avoid the wakefulness. I found it very distracting. I think next time (when there is slight wakefulness) I should just go for straight WILD attempt through the whole thing. This dream was a bit of a failure but it was a valuable learning experience. 117 - Headlights - DILD I find myself in my car, backing out of my driveway. I notice a car passing down the street behind me. As I wait for it I see the headlights pass in front of me. I think maybe it was a reflection of the glass at first but then I remember something. "I am dreaming!" In an instant, the dream collapses and I find myself in a FA in my bed. I am not sure but I think I felt very mild vibrations. I stand up but the dream is unstable. The dream environment it swirling and dark. I look at my hands and rub them. All physical sensations are vivid but all I can see is my hands and blackness beyond. My vision is like I am drunk. I begin to feel rushed and a little frantic to get this dream going. (Looking back I realize that I need to start calming myself more and taking my time. I always forget my basics.) I had intended to do the the basic TOTM but for some reason I have the Rome TOTY in mind. Being impatient I decide to try and change the scene again. I spin around in place for several rotations and extremely fast. I stop and relax myself. Almost against my will I stiffen like a board and fall over to my back like a cut tree. As I float in the black void, I tell myself to wake up in a Roman Colosseum. I open my eyes but find myself in another FA. I try to get up out of bed but this time I slide horizontally to my right. The blankets stick to me like glue for a moment. I calmly will it away. Now I am standing. I am frustrated and decided to just see what happens when I meditate in a lucid. I remember that since reading <PERSON> book, I have wanted to try it. I close my eyes and calm myself. I do the traditional "OM." I begin to get very strange sensations. Like my body is breaking up and becoming wave energy. I take this as the dream breaking up and I think I am waking. I give up and lose concentration. I find my non-lucid self standing in my bedroom doorway walking in. I see a strange, large, brown insect flying in front of me. I try to get closer to study it. At that point I remember something and instantly wake. I wait for <PERSON> but it is no use.